I'm quite miserable, and many of the things that you wrote about echoed realisations that I've already experienced in the past few years of my life. I'm fully aware of myself as an information-processing system, a survival machine constructed as an enterprise by my genes to serve their selfish interests of propagation. I understand that free will is an illusion, that my consciousness is an emergent property of the interaction of the 50 billion or so neurons that comprise my 1500 gram meat-computer brain. I'm aware that my existence, and the existence of the human race, is completely devoid of any objective meaning and purpose.
None of this upsets me - what does upset me, more than anything, is the needless suffering of the human race, and indeed all sentient life, when it quite clear that we would all be better off not existing, something you make perfectly lucid in your own work.