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Realizations
What are some moments of realization you have throughout life, and how did they affect your choices?
I think the moments of realization hit us like jaw fracture. Too many of them and you'll be the loser on the ring. The first happened in 5th grade, I realized the falseness of social relations. I was a good student, a teacher's favourite, known. My classmates were bullying another poor, not as smart girl disliked by the teacher through spreading rumours of her AID infection. In 3 months, I ended up trading place with her. After a stay in the hospital, everywhere I was marked as 'cancer'. Just like that, friendship, respect, teacher's love, intelligence went down the drain. I realized struggling to have 'place' or not didn't matter. The pressure at the top is real just as at the bottom... I never fully recover from that realization. Everywhere I look, I see the same power struggle, fitting in, etc. What's the use? The top is just as uncomfortable as the bottom. 'In' or 'out', you will never escape. What's your realization? |
Re: Realizations
I had one yesterday.
I decided that Socrates was right and that poets/artists generally don't know what they're talking about. I'd resisted this idea for a long time, but the point is, it doesn't invalidate art. As he says (at least by Plato's account), poets are 'inspired' not wise. That doesn't mean they can't be the latter, it's just that, falling in love with the former, they tend to believe that it includes the latter and so don't trouble to cultivate the latter. |
Re: Realizations
There's nothing more irritating than seeing some self-declared 'artist' holding forth and offering their opinion on every damn topic under the sun and expecting to be taken seriously. Of course the culture of celebrity and the 24/7 media machine needs people to be spouting off constantly. Artists should just concentrate on becoming better artists, and stop deluding themselves that they have special 'insights' into human life that other mere mortals are denied.
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Re: Realizations
Although I would supplement what I said above with the following (and the wish that more 'poets', in whatever medium, were closer to this model):
https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/The_H...of_Abyssinia/X |
Re: Realizations
I realised a while ago that I shouldn't really trust anything my own mind or senses tell me and by extension anything any media outlet or human tells me. It is completely impossible for me to be certain about anything in this world, and this is a source of great inspiration and freedom or great panic and stress depending on how I feel at each particular moment.
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Re: Realizations
This is a moment from my sinful past . . .
I don't know why I believed it, but after the third losing hand at Blackjack, in a crowded Jersey casino, I thought that I could just "force" a big enough payoff to recoup my earlier winnings. I split pairs, doubled down, played two handed, caught the "right" cards, but continued to lose. At ten losing hands in a row I thought that it was impossible to lose another one. At fifteen, I was gloating in my sweaty apprehension of the next card. After, ironically enough, twenty one losing hands in a row - I was broke. Other players, including the dealer wouldn't even look me in the eye, not that there was much to see except defeat. They actually got up from their seats so that they wouldn't accidentally touch me as I rose to leave. My realization was that bad luck, karma, destiny or fate, can throw you for a loop anytime or anywhere, and it doesn't necessarily have to end, but how I handle it will affect me more than the outside force. *This came in very handy a little while later when confronted with my substance abuse problem. |
Re: Realizations
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Re: Realizations
I have been on this earth nearly half a century. I have tried many things, believed many things, and always tried to find my place in the world. My biggest personal revelation is when I learned that my proper place is.... nowhere. There are outsiders, and I am one of them. I don't feel superior to my fellow humans, I just cannot relate to them (does that make me inferior?). Maybe I observe too much, analyze too much, or am just locked into my own world because that is where I find the greatest comfort.
This used to disturbed me a great deal, but not anymore. I have stopped trying to climb ladders or fit in or garner attention. I am happiest, if I should use the word, when left to my own devices. They say that people cannot be left alone with their own thoughts, that it would drive them mad. I think thats all that keeps me sane. |
Re: Realizations
" I think the moments of realization hit us like jaw fractures. Too many of them and you'll be the loser on the ring."
The realization that our society (any society) is obsessed with the winning/losing paradigm continues to deepen, as does the attendant realization that the correct spiritual attitude towards worldly loss or gain looks a lot like, appears to be in fact impossible to separate from, well... worldly loss. The subsequent realization then presents itself that the logical tendency to fear those jaw fractures is in fact counter to our spiritual well-being. Too much time and energy in this society is being spent on imagining oneself the champion, and too little is given to consideration of the loser on the ring. |
Re: Realizations
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Is it due to lack of empathy or due to the absurdity of these contests? :confused: Either way, being a winner isn't necessarily good. Once you're at the top, you have to continue being at the top. If not, your fall will be hard and devastating. |
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