Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Ditto, "intelligent lyrics" are overrated imo. I used to put more stock in that sort of thing, but now lyrics have to be exceptionally dumb and annoying for me to notice. Actually, I listen to a lot of music in which terrible lyrics are part of the charm.

Emo can have gothy flourishes to it, especially more recent stuff. A lot of it is more based on hardcore punk and straightedge culture. It's a surprisingly broad spectrum (a rainbow of crap!)

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

My God - Rainbow of Crap! Now there's a good band name!

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Pestilent Pregnant

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

The Neck Romancers

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Bone Appetite

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Slow Devolution
Houses in Motion
Violent Porpoises
Submediants
The Tritone Paradox
Spacious
Miscreant and Malediction
Unabashed Filth
Nodules
Strange Creaking Noise
Lip of the Chasm
The Roman Nose
Weakly Interacting Massive Particles
This Missive
Ululating
La Di Da
Pygmy Mountain Shrew
Skulks Often
Wrathful Deities
The (Guy With The) Annoying Lisp
(Not) Fond Of Spiders
(Of) Questionable Content
The(e) Full Pack
Whichever
You Fish On That Side...
Pleurisy
Blastocysts

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

An update of previous things: I have a band, and we have a gig, in fact. We're called, quite simply, Autosuggestion, and we're opening for another band in Philadelphia in October. You can send me a PM for details if you like....

The name came about from the perverse idea I had of marketing (conceptually and sonically) disturbing and/or depressing music as "auto-suggestive therapy tapes"; It also implies self-hypnosis, and so mind control, which all music essentially is to varying degrees.

And, less intellectually, it is also the title of one of Joy Division's most morose tunes, a loping slice of schizoid trance music akin to something I might write or aspire to, albeit more aggressive at points than most of our material.

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

You have my attention, of course. Let's hear a demo!

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

This is slightly off topic, but seeing this thread reminded me of it.

Years ago, I thought that if I had a pub I'd call it The Victim of Sexism. The pub sign would be a 1950s style pin-up painting (after manner of Vargas, I thought).

I think that the idea arose from seeing a pub called The Hero of Inkerman. (Inkerman was a battle during the Crimean War.)

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Unfortunately, good doctor, I am currently not a member of a service by which I might upload a demo. If anyone is interested, however, I can send them a sampler of our material via e-mail (request by PM); If they are not so thoroughly dissuaded (and I would hope they are not), we plan to establish a mail order service, via which we will distribute our recordings.

Furthermore, video of our upcoming first* performance may well end up on YouTube, due to my band-mates' amateur film-making proclivities.

Of the likely set-list, we are absolutely sure of only three songs: A snaky instrumental with a very long title (our bassist wrote it; we call it "Tommy" for various reasons), an epic trudge simply known as "Night", and a twisted, synth-driven creature tentatively entitled "Exorcism". Also potentially playable are "Drowned", "Mirrors", and "Culpable, Shameless, Violent", the latter ironically an unabashed dance track...

*An earlier incarnation of this band appeared at a high school "battle of the bands" outside Philadelphia a few years back; We were missing both our vocalist and bassist, and so, not having a set name in the first place, we went on as Twice Removed... Or was it Thrice Removed? The brief appearance was further marred by technical difficulties and general confusion, although the performance went over fairly well with the audience, though...

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

The Rusty Bike Platoon

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

The Flagellant Scarves

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Black metal: Sonegalt, Gravfølge.
Electro: Weltanschauung, Der Wille zur Takt.
Pop: Empathy Test, Leo Needs a New Pair of Shoes, Society of the Spectacular.
Prog: Sub Specie Aeternitatis.
Punk: Treblinka Tremoloes, Proverbs for Paranoids.

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Some highschool band names we used:
Wargasm
The Skeleteens
Cock Lobster
We didn't have a band though, we just made fliers for clubs downtown which didn't exist to hand out so we could pick up girls. I don't remember it working.

But I think a good band name would be The Gingerbread Werewolves. I think it was a Dead Kennedys song...I know I've heard it somewhere.

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Nice. I'd buy the shirt without even knowing what the band is. No doubt it would be screamo though.

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

As opposed to Rock Lobster? :confused:

The girls were smarter than you thought, eh? ;)

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Leather Matchstick
Clapping Infinity
Cotton Candy Cult

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Bands that should exist, but almost certainly do not:

-Passerines: Driven by echo-laden electric cello à la Arthur Russell married to swirling, elegant guitar in the vein of the Chameleons or Felt, muffled, moody vocals and wild jazz drumming.
-Neue Schönheit: Angular rhythms, vague song structures, throbbing distorted bass, megaphone vocals, atonal steel drum solos and quartertone bouzouki.
-The Book Is On The Table: Two vocalists, one a yelping tenor, the other a roaring basso profundo, augmented by wailing Wasp synth, agile fretless bass, contrabassoon, sopranino sax, and two classical percussionists.
-The Mezzanine Jumpers: A ruthlessly noisy punk outfit, songs ranging from prestissimo to grave, using random debris for percussion and having all their instruments fretted to 13-tone equal temperament.
-Cosmonauts: Laptop electronica crew influenced by Algerian rai, gamelan, Eraserhead and Laurie Anderson, employing, alongside their keyboards, tuned cymbals, a harmonium and a five-string banjo.
-Broken Eye Sealant: A power electronics quartet employing electrified chamber instruments, contact microphones and homemade effects pedals.
-Trenchant Mutter: A glorious fusion of R.E.M., Cabaret Voltaire (industrial band and Dadaist club) and a barbershop quartet. On steroids.
-Salt Herring and Loaves: Morose trio of vibraphone, tuba and baritone guitar, with soft and wistful but oddly disturbing vocals.
-The (Shameless) Reprobates: Jagged chamber-pop in the oeuvre of the Fire Engines' "Candyskin", but with the "lead" guitar replaced by two keyboards (a Hammond organ and an Ondes Martinot) and with clever, unbelievably sarcastic/sinister lyrics.
-Profuse Seepage: Eerie, minimal trip-hop driven by weird samples and skittering slo-mo breakbeats with Sonic Youth-meets-Keith Rowe guitar abuse and ghostly echo chamber vocals overtop.
-Prion 7: Drumming like live action Venetian Snares mixed with squalls of bass saxophone, buzzing Soft Machine-styled organ and operatic vocoder terrorism.

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Who Let These Guys Onstage?

(WLTGO to the true fans)

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Swine Flutes

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

My ex-wife came up with Intravenous Quasimodo. Reminiscent of that one Spinal Tap album, but I liked it quite a bit.

I have always been partial to TWITCH, but I assume it has already been done. If I ever get around to making noises on my own, it would be Mr. Anthrope. For an entire band, I'd probably go with Crossface Chickenwing.

Fun thread!

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Consumptive Orphans.

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Ooof. Very good, actually....

Here's one which I'm using currently, which makes more than one good reference:

Godhead Dying Downwards.

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Gas Station Urinals (ahem...)

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Years ago, I saw a thing on Warrenellis.com about a music subgenre called "witch house" that specializes in band names spelled out in nonstandard characters to make it hard for people to google them. Because of this intentional un-searchability, I never got to hear any of the music. it is with these witch housers in mind that my band name would be µȠȠΣϽëßßÆƦƳ ÜmŁĄɄŦ, and we would pronounce it "throat warbler mangrove"

I imagine we'd be an a capella joy division cover band, unless I learn some other songs or someone knows how to play an instrument.

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

“I Foreign I, Truth Foray Truth”

I would like to think my band would indulge in some of the traditionally unsociable antics of a rock group; sadly TVs these days are so big that to hurl one out of a hotel window would put your back out….

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

DREAD

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Where are all the crystal lizards??!!

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"Thank you very much, we are Humorous Band Name Generator! Goodnight!"

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

DREAD, a good one, sundog! (probably already exists) Sleepytime Gorilla Museum (Ah yes! they too exist, and are fabulously talented)

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

Rowe's Fawn.
Cause there's already like 20+ bands named "Schrodinger's Cat" in every city I go to hear live music at since the guys in the band think that makes 'em sound smart and philosophical. As of last night I have yet to find one of their band members who even knows what it means.

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Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

A quirky name for a band might be Labatt Blue Öyster Cult.

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Performing at an abandoned sanitarium near you: Dr. Locrian and the Mysteriarchs .

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Performing in The Night School auditorium for faculty and the student body: Miss Plarr and the Truants.

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Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

If I had a band I would name it either Fuchsia Groan, after Gormenghast, or Laura Palmer, after Twin Peaks. And that's because Godspeed You! Black Emperor is already taken.

Re: If I Had a Band, I'd Name It...
 

exhume! the troglodytes